Where to now?

First of all thanks to everyone who is trying to help out or has offered help with the internet issue. I will get on to it tomorrow....or more accurately I'll get Jason on to it!! While I used to be the technical director for all household goods he is slowly learning how to make things work himself!!
I had my appointment with my medical oncology team today. It was a take stock and figure out what to do now meeting. Mainly because I wasn't prepared to go and have another round of chemo if no improvement was shown since the last scan. I class improvement even as no progression of disease because based on the last scans, it was very aggressive and moving very fast. It will be interesting to see where it's at now.
So, the plan is, I have scans tomorrow arvo, and a blood test some time in the next few days, and we will look at both results and decide whether to go forward with cycle 3 of chemo. It was supposed to be this Friday, but we have postponed until Friday next week, 30th Oct. The problem is, I can't know for sure one way or another if the chemo is making me sick or if it's disease. It would be so much easier if everything was just straight forward wouldn't it? Decision making would become a breeze because all our options and their consequences would be incredibly clear. Too easy....
We used some of our put away holiday money today to buy a video camera. We figured we aren't going away in a big hurry, so we spent it on something useful as far as creating something for the boys goes. I plan on doing a bit of a spiel for them as trying to get some everyday footage of me interacting with them, particularly with Hamish as h will have no recollection of these early months. At least then he wll have something to look at when he is older to remind him of his Mum.
The family portraits yesterday were great. It was great fun and from the ones I have seen so far, they look pretty good too. They photographer Carly, was awesome. So patient with the boys and you could tell she was really passionate about what she does. I would highly recommend her to anyone. I will see if I can figure out how to attach one of the phtotos to here so you can see how great they are.
I was exhausted by the end. After having my hair and makeup done, which took about an hour, we then took photos for about 2.5 hours. It's a lot of excitement for me who is used to just short outings, so I couldn't wait to get home unfortunately. But they undestood and man I had a good sleep when I got home!
I was having a pretty bad day on Sunday, healthwise. I was a bit chucky for the first time so that was no good. I have been feeling a bit off for most of the week really. Don't know why because chemo should be ut of my system by now well and truly.....anyway, who knows??
Well, I'll try to figure out how to upload photosand let you know as I know more about results etc. xxxx

NEVER, NEVER, NEVER GIVE UP!