Crappy day - with some good stuff too though!

First, I want to thank our mystery Santa shopper who obviously reads this, based on the package left on our front doorstep this morning. I didn't get to juicing the cabbage today but I will tomorrow, I promise! And to everyone else for your support it has been truly overwhelming and we are so grateful that we are lucky enough to such beautiful friends and family. Thank you.
I decided today that the crappy feeling is the chemo side effects, the nausea is getting worse and unfortunately the pain is back with avengence! Not good when you are still coughing incessantly.
On the upside though, the nurse who comes out to see me regularly can fix it all! She made a couple of phone calls and organised for more pain relief and nausea medication so by this time tomorrow I expect to be on top of the world!
It was great to see this nurse at work.....she has obviously been doing it for a while. She got on the phone to the Palliative care doctor at the hospital who of course wanted to admit me again to "stabilise" me. She very nicely but firmly suggested that perhaps we could try getting me onto a pump at home to avoid another hospital stay given I have young children with whom I would like to be with at home.
She managed to convince him, thanks so much Jenelle! She bought us some time so at least we have a chance to see if the pump can work before they will try to admit me again.
I am really amazed at how much community health assistance is around. I guess you don't normally have a need for it so it's not something you would just happen to stumble across. They have a child bereavement counsellor that Matt can sit down with and we can see where he is at with all of this. The nurse was here for about 2.5 hours and in that time saw Matt really acting up, which we can only assume is his way of reacting to everything going on. Talking to this lady will hopefully give him a chance to let out some stuff.....and help us understand a little better what's going on in his head.....if that's possible!!! Oh, and I think the counselling is free!
If nothing else is achieved he will have the hugest 5 year old medical vocabulary in the world. It's amazing what he remembers and then regurgitates in the correct context which is more surprising.
Apart from new drugs tomorrow, I have another high point planned. I have an oncology massage booked at 2pm. I can't wait. He comes to your house so it's all stress free I basically just have to move from the chair to the massage table relax and it's done. Doesn't get any better than that!
Best be off to sleep now xxx

NEVER, NEVER, NEVER GIVE UP!